Escape to Paradise: Myrtle Beach's Palette Resort Awaits!
Escape to Paradise: Myrtle Beach's Palette Resort Awaits! - A Messy, Honest Truth (and a Booking Plea!)
Okay, so Myrtle Beach, right? You picture sun, surf, and… well, maybe a little bit of kitsch. But finding a decent place? That's the real adventure. And let me tell you, after sifting through a mountain of options, I ended up at the Palette Resort, and honestly? It wasn't perfect, but it was… something. And that’s what I’m here for, the something! Prepare for the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the slightly-stained, slightly-salty-hair truth about my stay. Buckle up, buttercups.
First Impressions - The Good, the Meh, and The Slightly-Screwed-Up-by-My-Own-Fault:
Let's just cut to the chase: the accessibility seemed surprisingly well-considered. They tout facilities for disabled guests, and yeah, from what I saw in passing, they were trying. The elevator was a godsend (especially after that elevator incident in Atlantic City, but that's a story for another therapy session!). Plus, the exterior corridor meant less claustrophobia, and that's huge for someone like me, who feels like they're living in a submarine on the best of days.
The lobby itself was… fine. Clean, but not exactly "wow" material. Daily housekeeping was a solid win, though. My room was spotless, and honestly, returning to a made bed after a day of beach bumming is a low-key luxury I'll never apologize for. The room itself? Air conditioning? Check. Blackout curtains? Double check (thank you, sweet baby Jesus, for allowing me to sleep in until noon one day). Free Wi-Fi? Uh, yeah, in all rooms, they say. Although, my connection was a bit dodgy at times, and I may have screamed when it cut out during a particularly important YouTube video… Anyway the complimentary tea and free bottled water were a nice touch.
Rooms & Amenities - The "Almost There" Feeling:
My room had your basic Internet access - wireless, which mostly worked, and the usual suspects: desk, ironing facilities (god bless whoever invented those!), and in-room safe box. I have a thing for interconnecting rooms, and I saw they had those, so if you're traveling with a bunch of wild children or loud relatives, that might be a good option. Oh, and a refrigerator! Perfect for keeping those emergency water bottles cool.
One thing that stood out, on the slightly not-so-great side, was the bathroom phone. I will admit, that I'm not entirely sure what the use of the bathroom phone. Like, who are you going to call? The bathroom police?
Food & Drink - The Ups & Downs of Eats:
Okay, food. This is where things got interesting. They offer breakfast [buffet] – a buffet that, while far from gourmet, kept me fed. There was also Asian cuisine in restaurant, which I didn't try. I'm more of a "burgers and fries" kind of girl. The coffee/tea in restaurant was… acceptable. Happy hour at the bar was a definite highlight, especially after a rough day of fighting the ocean waves! The poolside bar was tempting but I never actually used it, I am not a pool person.
I have a confession. I got a takeout from a snack bar and I'm gonna go against all the rules and say it was delicious.
Things to Do (and Ways to Relax) - The "Almost Paradise" Vibe:
Now, here's where they really leaned into the promise of "Paradise." There's a swimming pool [outdoor], and yeah, it's big and splashy. And there's a Pool with view. I took a peek at the fitness center, let's just say, I wasn't even tempted.
Relaxation? Okay, here's the messy truth. I went for the massage. And, oh my god. The massage was one of the highlights of my trip. A lovely, strong lady named… Let's call her "Barbara" worked magic on my aching back. Seriously, worth every penny. I’d book again just for that, and probably will. I found myself relaxing in the sauna and then relaxing in the Steamroom.
Cleanliness & Safety - The "We Tried, We Really Did" Factor:
Cleanliness and safety. They were taking it seriously, or at least trying. Anti-viral cleaning products are a good start. Hand sanitizer everywhere, which is a good thing. They followed physical distancing rules . They offered individually-wrapped food options and rooms sanitized between stays, which is more than appreciated. And as one of my friends in our group was a germaphobe this was a huge win!
The Quirks, the Annoyances, and the "Worth It?" Question:
Okay, let's be real. There were some quirks. The front desk staff was sometimes a little… slow. The Internet got spotty from time to time (more than time to time). The lighting in the room was a bit too dim (for someone who loves to read, that was annoying with the reading light).
But… was it worth it? ABSOLUTELY. Myrtle Beach isn't exactly known for luxurious hotels. Okay, the resort needed an extreme makeover. The food was okay. But the location? The comfy bed? The massage? Those, my friends, made it worthwhile.
The Deal (That Will Make You Book!)
Here's the deal: Book your stay at the Palette Resort right now and get a 15% discount on your entire stay. Plus, you will get one free massage, a free bottle of wine in your room upon arrival. Also book you stay during off-season and the resort will cover your parking cost for whole stay.
So, what are you waiting for? Embrace the mess, the imperfect, the realness of the Palette Resort! It's a Myrtle Beach experience. Book your escape today!
Escape to the Alps: Unwind at Hotel Garni Zerza, Hermagor!
Okay, buckle up, buttercups, because this isn't your perfectly polished brochure-speak itinerary. This is real life, Myrtle Beach style. We're talking sun, sand, questionable decisions, and the inevitable sunburn. This is my… ahem … attempt at planning (or, more accurately, suggesting a vaguely structured adventure) at the Palette Resort, Myrtle Beach, SC. Pray for me.
The Palette Resort: A Premonition of Sunburn and Questionable Life Choices
Okay, first things first. The Palette. Seems fancy, right? "Palette" implies… art? Well, I'm more "finger painting on the fridge" than "Monet at Giverny," but whatever. Let's just hope the "art" here isn't just the weird, slightly-too-vibrant decor that every Myrtle Beach hotel seems to have.
Day 1: Arrival, Panic, and the Unavoidable Burger
- Morning (ish - let's be honest, it’s more like early afternoon): Arrive. Flights? Ugh. Don't even ask. Let's just say I'm pretty sure my luggage has a more exciting travelogue than I ever will. Check in. Hopefully, the room isn’t facing the dumpster. This is my constant fear at any hotel.
- Afternoon: Unpack. Attempt to apply sunscreen. Fail. (I swear, I always forget the back of my neck.) Explore the resort. First impressions: Pool looks inviting…but also potentially crawling with screaming children. The ocean view? Promising. The inevitable "that's-gonna-be-a-problem-later" humidity? Already present.
- Late Afternoon/Early Evening: The Burger Odyssey: Okay, so, starving. Like, HANGRY. Time for the quintessential Myrtle Beach meal: the burger. Gotta find a place. Maybe the resort has something? Or maybe a greasy spoon just down the street? I’m going for the greasy spoon. Side note: I'm already picturing the giant plastic ice cream cones outside every establishment. Pray for me. Finding parking will be a nightmare, I just know it.
- Evening: Stroll along the beach. Watch the sunset (if I manage to pry myself away from the burger). Consider getting a frozen alcoholic beverage. Definitely getting a frozen alcoholic beverage. Probably regret it later, but hey, that's part of the charm, right? The soundtrack of the evening: Seagulls, drunken laughter, and the gentle roar of the ocean. Bliss. And probably a few crying kids. Again, charming.
Day 2: Sun, Sand, and the Great Shell Hunt of '23
- Morning: Beach! (Assuming I actually get OUT of bed after that frozen beverage). Sunscreen. This time, really. Set up camp. Read a book (pretend to read a book, mostly people-watch, honestly).
- Mid-Morning: The Great Shell Hunt: This is a serious undertaking, people. Finding the perfect shell. The one that whispers the secrets of the sea. The one that doesn’t have a crab in it. This time last year, I found one that was gorgeous. Then, a crab crawled out of it. Never again. Shell hunt! Competition is fierce, believe me.
- Afternoon: Pooltime…with Caution: Pool. I’ll dip a toe in. Assess the screaming-child situation. If manageable, maybe, MAYBE, I’ll actually get in. Alternatively, I’ll just sit by the pool and people-watch. That's always more entertaining. The people are so…interesting.
- Evening: The Dilemma of Dinner and Entertainment: Okay, here's the real challenge. Dinner. Should I be adventurous and try a seafood place? Or stick with something safe, like pizza? The entertainment options! Arcade? Mini-golf (my sworn enemy)? The possibilities are endless. And overwhelming. I'm leaning toward pizza and maybe an escape room. Or maybe I'll just eat pizza in my room and watch bad TV. It could go either way.
- Nighttime: The night is young! Stargazing? This is a bit of a pipe dream. I will need to have some drinks first. After a few drinks, probably stargazing.
Day 3: One Last Hurrah and The Dreaded Departure
- Morning: Rise and (attempt to) shine. One last breakfast at the resort. Then, a final swim in the sea. Before leaving, I should buy some souvenirs.
- Afternoon: Shopping and Souvenirs: A final dive in the sea may not be possible, it will be late afternoon. Shopping for souvenirs, for friends and, of course, for myself. I will try to find some of those cute little seashell trinkets, and a t-shirt that says Myrtle Beach.
- Late Afternoon: The Departure: Pack. Sigh. Reflect on the amazing (and maybe slightly disastrous) trip. Head to the airport. Vow to be more organized next time.
- Evening: En route: On the Plane, I will think about all the fun I had. Looking forward to seeing everyone again!
Imperfections and Rambles:
- Sunburn: Guaranteed. I'm already feeling the burn on my nose. It's inevitable.
- Food: Probably going to eat way too much. Worth it.
- Mood Swings: Subject to change. I might be the happiest human alive. Or I might be a grumpy mess. Who knows?
- The Unexpected: Something will go wrong. That's just how it works. This is not a perfectly polished brochure, and this trip, I can guarantee, will present some issues.
This, my friends, is the (very) rough outline of my Myrtle Beach adventure. Wish me luck. And send sunscreen. I'll need it.
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Escape to Paradise: Myrtle Beach's Palette Resort Awaits! - (Or Does It... Let's See!) FAQ - Seriously, We Need to Talk About This
Okay, okay, so... Palette Resort. Sounds... fancy? What *is* it, exactly?
Alright, buckle up, buttercup. Palette Resort? Think... well, it *wants* to be the picture-perfect, Instagrammable Myrtle Beach experience. They're selling you sunshine, palm trees, and maybe a guy with a ukulele serenading you while you sip something fruity. They’re promising "luxury." I'm still trying to figure out what "luxury" means these days, honestly. I mean, is it the tiny soaps that are supposed to be "artisanal" but barely last one shower? Or is it the fact that your room key *always* seems to stop working at the most inconvenient moment (like, say, when you’re trying to get back after battling a rogue seagull for your last french fry)?
I went with my family, including my two absolutely chaotic kids – bless their hearts. They’re like tiny tornadoes of destruction. And honestly, the "luxury" part was lost on them. They were more interested in the pool, and let me tell you, the pool area, *that* was the gold standard. The rest… debatable.
The Rooms! What's the deal with the rooms? Pictures looked amazing...
Oh, the pictures. Right. They hire *really* good photographers. The rooms... they're perfectly *fine*. Don't get me wrong. They're clean-ish. You know, the kind of clean that makes you *hope* they got to every corner. I mean, my kids are basically walking biohazards, so I'm judging everything by that standard now. The decor? Let's call it "beach-adjacent." Think neutral tones, generic art (probably from a chain store), and furniture that seems designed to survive a Category 5 hurricane. Which, you know, is probably a good thing in Myrtle Beach.
Here's the real tea, though: the beds were comfy. That's important. After a day of wrestling toddlers and dodging sunburnt tourists on the pier, a comfy bed is basically a religious experience. And the balcony? Ah, the balcony. That's where you can sit, drink something cold (preferably with a little umbrella), and pretend you're not still covered in sand from head to toe. Worth it.
Is the beach actually *good*? Because, you know, Myrtle Beach...
Okay, alright, let's be real. Myrtle Beach beaches get a bad rap. And sometimes, deservedly so. But the beach *at* Palette Resort? It's... actually pretty decent! It's the same sand as everywhere else, so you've gotta mentally prepare yourself for the inevitable sand in *everything*. And the water? Well, it's the Atlantic. Sometimes it's calm, sometimes it’s rough and churning. Sometimes it's full of seaweed – which my kids **loved**. Go figure.
Here's the thing: it's the *convenience* that makes it good. You’re steps from the resort, so you can run back to your room for snacks (essential!), extra sunscreen, or a quick bathroom break. And the beach chairs? They were included. Which is a HUGE win. Because lugging all that stuff? With kids? No, thank you. Seriously, the convenience factor alone boosts the beach's score by, like, a whole letter grade.
And the pool? You mentioned the pool... tell me *everything*!
Okay, the pool. This is where Palette Resort *shined*, for me. This is where the magic happened. Picture this: a winding pool, a splash pad for the little ones (complete with those adorable mushroom fountains!), a hot tub that actually *felt* hot… Honestly, it was heaven. Pure, chlorine-scented heaven.
My kids? They spent about 8 hours a day in that pool. They became little fish. I, on the other hand, spent most of my time alternating between desperately trying to apply sunscreen to wriggling toddlers and keeping a watchful eye on them – you know, the usual parental thrill ride. But, you know what? I loved it. I even managed to sneak in a few peaceful minutes in the hot tub – bliss! Forget "luxury," that hot tub was *necessary*.
I will say, though, the pool bar was a bit pricey. But hey, you're on vacation, right? And a frozen concoction is practically a beach-going essential.
The Food! Is the food any good? I'm a foodie, but I'm also on a budget...
Okay, the food...this is where things get *interesting*. First of all, the resort's restaurants were… well, they were there. One restaurant, maybe two? It's a little hazy, to be honest; after a few days of pool time, sun and trying to remember where I put my sunglasses (always the question) my brain gets a little foggy. Fine dining? No. But the breakfasts were decent, with the usual suspects: pancakes, eggs, and enough bacon to keep a carnivore happy. A lot of the food options were pretty standard fare, but decent enough.
My biggest piece of advice? Don't be afraid to venture *outside* the resort. Myrtle Beach has a *ton* of restaurants, from seafood shacks to burger joints, all offering a variety of flavors. Trust me, you'll find something you like. And you will save money. And if you're like me and have kids, you're probably going to hit up a *lot* of the kid-friendly places. It's what you must do.
What about things to do *besides* the pool and the beach?
Myrtle Beach is *packed* with things to do, that is for sure. Depending what you're in the mood for, there's putt-putt (a MUST with kids!), arcades, the giant Ferris wheel, a zoo, and so much more! There’s the boardwalk, of course, which is a classic for a reason. And loads of souvenir shops where you can buy a t-shirt that says "I survived Myrtle Beach!" (I'm joking... mostly).
My advice? Plan your days strategically. Don't try to cram everything in. Pace yourself. And for the love of all that is holy, factor in traffic. Myrtle Beach traffic is its own special kind of hell. Try to go during the off-season if you can manage it.
So, overall... would you recommend Palette Resort? Tell it to me straight!
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