Londoner Hotel Macau: Luxurious Escape Awaits!
Blown Away (and Briefly Annoyed): My Wild Ride at the Londoner Hotel Macau - A Review You Can Actually Trust
Alright, alright, settle in, because I'm about to spill the tea, the coffee, and maybe a little bit of that sparkling wine from the amazing poolside bar at the Londoner Hotel Macau. This isn't your typical, sanitized, PR-approved review. This is real talk. I'm talking about the highs, the lows, the "wait, did that really just happen?" moments, and everything in between. Buckle up, buttercups.
First Impressions & Accessibility – The Grand Entrance (and the Small Stumbles)
The Londoner. Macau. Just saying it sounds fancy, right? And let me tell you, the lobby? Gorgeous. Seriously, a feast for the eyes. Think opulent British grandeur, all polished marble and soaring ceilings. They clearly went all-in on the London theme – red phone booths, double-decker buses (that I think were for photos – I never quite figured out how to ride one of those), and the whole shebang. This place is Instagram gold, folks.
Accessibility: Now, as someone who likes to make the most of things and is keen on going out with family and friends, I was pretty happy with the level of accessibility. There are lifts everywhere, which is a lifesaver. Ramps are in place so you don't have to worry about stairs and that's cool. They seem to have really thought about it. However, there's a small, minor hiccup. Getting to the main entrance from the drop-off zone felt longer than it needed to, but I'm honestly nitpicking. The hotel is clearly designed to make things simple – and inclusive. They're pretty good at making sure you can get everywhere with ease.
On-site accessible restaurants/lounges & Wheelchair accessible: Definitely a yes on both counts. I saw several restaurants – more on those later – that seemed perfectly accessible for wheelchairs, and the lounges were spacious and easy to navigate. Kudos, Londoner!
Rooms – My Cozy Castle (with a Tiny Glitch)
Okay, the rooms. Wow. My room was… well, it was a room fit for a king (or at least a very comfortable Duchess). We are talking about a spacious room with a huge bed, plush bathrobes (major win!), and a bathroom that was bigger than my entire apartment back home.
Available in all rooms: Yes! Air conditioning, an alarm clock (thank god, I'm useless without one), bathrobes, blackout curtains (essential for beating jet lag), a coffee/tea maker (yes, please!), complimentary tea (double yes!), free bottled water, a hair dryer, an in-room safe box (I’m a bit of a clutz, so that was brilliant), Internet access – wireless and much much more !
Internet access & Free Wi-Fi in all rooms! & Internet [LAN] & Internet services & Wi-Fi in public areas: All thumbs up! Wi-Fi was strong and reliable everywhere, even by the pool (more on that later). Plus, the LAN option is good if you're a workaholic who likes a dedicated connection.
The only tiny, tiny snag? My TV once decided to start speaking Mandarin about 3 AM. Now, I don't speak Mandarin. Or Cantonese. So, it was a slightly panicked, bleary-eyed scramble to find the remote and figure out how to turn it off. But hey, it added a bit of…adventure? (They fixed it promptly, so no real complaints).
Cleanliness and Safety – Peace of Mind (and a Very Thorough Clean)
I'm a bit of a germaphobe, I'll admit it. So, the Londoner's commitment to hygiene was a huge plus.
Anti-viral cleaning products, Breakfast in room, Breakfast takeaway service, Cashless payment service, Daily disinfection in common areas, Doctor/nurse on call, First aid kit, Hand sanitizer, Hot water linen and laundry washing, Hygiene certification, Individually-wrapped food options, Physical distancing of at least 1 meter, Professional-grade sanitizing services, Room sanitization opt-out available, Rooms sanitized between stays, Safe dining setup, Sanitized kitchen and tableware items, Shared stationery removed, Staff trained in safety protocol, Sterilizing equipment: They've got it all covered. The whole place felt meticulously clean. They even had personal sanitizer everywhere. I saw staff wiping down surfaces constantly, which made me feel…well, safe. Really safe.
Dining, Drinking, and Snacking – A Culinary Adventure (with a Side of Overwhelm)
Okay, this is where things get really interesting. The Londoner has more food options than I have fingers and toes.
A la carte in restaurant, Alternative meal arrangement, Asian breakfast, Asian cuisine in restaurant, Bar, Bottle of water, Breakfast [buffet], Breakfast service, Buffet in restaurant, Coffee/tea in restaurant, Coffee shop, Desserts in restaurant, Happy hour, International cuisine in restaurant, Poolside bar, Restaurants, Room service [24-hour], Salad in restaurant, Snack bar, Soup in restaurant, Vegetarian restaurant, Western breakfast, Western cuisine in restaurant: I mean, the list is endless! The breakfast buffet was an absolute beast. I'm talking everything from dim sum and Asian noodles to English breakfasts to… I lost count after the third trip to the pastry section.
The poolside bar was a highlight – perfect for sipping a cocktail while pretending you're a particularly glamorous spy. The restaurants were all fantastic, and I could definitely go on and on and on…
Things to do, ways to relax – Spa Day Nirvana (and a View to Die For!)
Body scrub, Body wrap, Fitness center, Foot bath, Gym/fitness, Massage, Pool with view, Sauna, Spa, Spa/sauna, Steamroom, Swimming pool, Swimming pool [outdoor]: Let's face it, you're coming to the Londoner to unwind. And, oh boy, is there plenty of unwinding to be done.
The spa was pure bliss. I got a massage that melted away all my stress. Their pool with a view is exactly what you want. I can't even describe the scene!
For the Kids – Family Fun (and a Little Bit of Chaos)
Babysitting service, Family/child friendly, Kids facilities, Kids meal: The Londoner is definitely family-friendly. I saw tons of kids running around, and from what I could tell, they were having a ball. There were dedicated play areas and kids' meals available, so parents, you can breathe a sigh of relief.
Services and conveniences – Smooth Sailing (with a Few Quirks)
Air conditioning in public area, Audio-visual equipment for special events, Business facilities, Cash withdrawal, Concierge, Contactless check-in/out, Convenience store, Currency exchange, Daily housekeeping, Doorman, Dry cleaning, Elevator, Essential condiments, Facilities for disabled guests, Food delivery, Gift/souvenir shop, Indoor venue for special events, Invoice provided, Ironing service, Laundry service, Luggage storage, Meeting/banquet facilities, Meetings, Meeting stationery, On-site event hosting, Outdoor venue for special events, Projector/LED display, Safety deposit boxes, Seminars, Shrine, Smoking area, Terrace, Wi-Fi for special events, Xerox/fax in business center: The hotel had a bunch of facilities.
One funny moment: I once asked the concierge if they had a specific type of tea, and the guy seemed a bit confused. He made a few calls, and a few minutes later, a butler arrived at my door with a selection of five different teas. It was a bit extra, but hey, I wasn't complaining!
Getting around – Easy Peasy (mostly!)
Airport transfer, Bicycle parking, Car park [free of charge], Car park [on-site], Car power charging station, Taxi service, Valet parking: Getting around was easy. Taxis were readily available, and the airport transfer was smooth as silk.
Additional touches & Other amenities:
- Air conditioning: Absolutely. You'll melt without it in Macau.
- Alarm clock: Necessary. I'd sleep forever if I didn't have it.
- Bathrobes: Yes, and soft, fluffy bathrobes.
- Bathtub, Shower: Standard, good quality.
- Blackout curtains: Essential for beating jet lag.
- Closet & Desk: Good for unpacking and working.
- Coffee/tea maker: Yes, and complimentary tea!
- Complimentary tea: Yes, a nice touch.
- Daily housekeeping: Kept everything spotless.
- Extra long bed: Awesome.
- Free bottled water: Saved me a fortune.
- Hair dryer: Standard.
- High floor: I managed to get to a higher floor!
- In-room safe box: Always a good idea.
- Internet access – LAN: Useful for dedicated connection.
- Internet access – wireless: Wi-Fi was strong and reliable.
- Ironing facilities: Needed to iron my clothes.
- Laptop workspace: Good for those who can't completely switch off.
- **
Alright, buckle up, buttercups, because we're ditching the pristine travelogue for a chaotic, real-life Londoner Hotel Macau experience. Forget the perfectly-boxed itinerary; we're going for a messy, glorious, and utterly human journey.
The Londoner Hotel Macau: A Hot Mess Adventure (and I wouldn't have it any other way)
Day 1: Arrival & The "OMG, So Much Gold" Effect
- 11:00 AM: Arrived at Macau International Airport. The air conditioning blasted a welcome (and relief) from the humidity. Taxi into The Londoner. I’ve seen pictures. I thought I was prepared. Nope. The sheer scale of the place hits you like a brick of gold bullion. Seriously, I half-expected to trip over a crown or be serenaded by a Beefeater. The lobby? A shimmering, dizzying kaleidoscope of marble, chandeliers, and enough gold leaf to bankrupt a small nation. My jaw dropped. My luggage, however, remained stubbornly unmoved. Good start.
- 12:00 PM: Check-in. This is where my "impeccable planning" (read: last-minute panic booking) showed its cracks. Booked the wrong room. Minor detail, I thought. They were happy to change it. The staff, bless them, were unfailingly polite despite my flustered state. I'm pretty sure they deal with this sort of thing daily.
- 1:00 PM: Room. Finally. The "Londoner Suite." Actually, it's more like a miniature Buckingham Palace. Everything is OTT (over-the-top, for the uninitiated). The bed? Gigantic. The bathroom? With a freaking bathtub that could probably fit a small family. I collapsed on that bed, feeling like I'd just won the lottery. Exhausted, delighted, and slightly intimidated.
- 2:30 PM: Lunch at The Green Room: Decided to begin our culinary journey. The food. was… perfectly fine. Nothing to write home about, but certainly edible. It was just pleasant after the initial shock. I ordered the steak, which was well cooked, but a bit, hmm, uninspired.
- 4:00 PM: Wandering Lost. Time for my first foray into the casino, or, well, any casino. I needed a bit of a wander around, and got lost in the vastness of it all. It was overwhelming. So many flashing lights, and the sounds of clinking, laughing, and the general buzz of excitement. I was pretty sure I saw a man in a full dragon costume at one point. (Could have been the jet lag, though).
- 6:00 PM: Dinner at Gordon Ramsay's Pub & Grill: Finally got to indulge myself. The cozy atmosphere and the smell of the hearty dishes was great. The burger was brilliant. The fish and chips was even better. A pure, unadulterated moment of food-induced bliss. This is what I needed after the casino.
- 8:00 PM: Evening Stroll. Time to explore. Saw the Eiffel Tower. The Venetian. It was all a little bit… surreal. The sheer amount of spectacle is dizzying. I was so tired, but the light was just amazing. It's a little overwhelming but you can't not give in to the magic of Macau.
- 9:30 PM: Back to the room, and absolutely crashed. Jet lag hit me like a ton of bricks.
Day 2: Retail Therapy, Tea, and a Sudden Craving for Bubble Tea
- 9:00 AM: Breakfast at the room - a luxurious spread of pastries, which I devoured in record time. Feeling slightly less jet-lagged, with that food fuel.
- 10:00 AM: Retail Therapy. The shopping at The Londoner is extensive (and expensive). I wandered around the stores. I resisted the urge to buy a ten-thousand-dollar handbag (mostly). Ended up with a ridiculously overpriced scarf. No regrets.
- 12:00 PM: Afternoon Tea at The Parisian. A moment of pure, unadulterated indulgence. Tiny sandwiches, delicate pastries, clotted cream… it felt incredibly elegant. I spent the whole time people-watching. The sheer variety of faces, the languages… I felt like I was in a movie scene. That tea was so soothing, I really needed it.
- 2:00 PM: An Unexpected Bubble Tea Quest. Walking around the pool, I had a CRAVING for bubble tea. I really needed one. I looked around to find a shop, and found one only a while searching. The drink? Amazing. I could have drunk five.
- 3:00 PM: Getting lost. Again. This time, amidst the labyrinthine corridors of the hotel. Not sure how I ended up in the "Londoner Macanese Street" - but it was lovely. I liked the authentic atmosphere, despite being indoors.
- 5:00 PM: A Deep Dive into the Spa. I think I was there for three hours. Body wraps, massage, and a general state of zen. I dozed off in a steam room, but woke up feeling like a new person.
- 7:00 PM: Dinner at the rooftop restaurant. The view. The food. The cocktails. The whole experience was beautiful. (Again, the view sold it).
- 9:00 PM: Time to relax – another early night. I'm not sure I was partying as hard as the locals.
Day 3: A Day of Duplicates, and a Farewell to A Magical Place.
- 9:00 AM: Breakfast – Same as before. It was getting addicting.
- 10:00 AM: Shopping. Yes, more. I was on a buying spree.
- 12:00 PM: Lunch – The Green Room, once again. The service was pretty good, and the food was alright.
- 1:00 PM: Casino - Another round. I played some low stakes games. I tried some slots. I lost my money. It was worth it.
- 4:00 PM: Tea – Yes, yet again. I went to the same place, and had the same tea.
- 6:00 PM: Dinner – Going to another restaurant in the hotel. It was just perfect.
- 7:00 PM: Packing. Sadly. I didn't want to leave.
- 9:00 PM: Last time at the casino.
- 10:00 PM: Sleep.
Day 4: Departure
- 9:00 AM: Check-out. Saying goodbye to this dream.
- 10:00 AM: Taxi to the airport. Reflecting on the most ridiculous, glorious, and utterly exhausting trip of my life. The Londoner Macau? It's an experience. It's a spectacle. It's a sensory overload. And I wouldn't trade it for anything.
- 12:00 PM: Arrived back.
Final Thoughts:
Look, this trip wasn't perfect. There were moments of confusion, moments of feeling overwhelmed, and moments of pure, unadulterated joy. But that's the beauty of travel, isn't it? It's the mess, the unexpected turns, the sheer humanity of it all that makes it memorable. So, if you're planning a trip to The Londoner Macau, embrace the chaos. Dive in headfirst. And don't forget to bring your sense of humor. You'll need it.
Now, if you'll excuse me, I need a nap. And maybe a big, strong coffee. Because Macau, you beautiful, gold-plated beast, you've worn me out in the best possible way.
Sapporo Airport & Subway: Cozy Room - 5-Min Walk!
Londoner Hotel Macau: Actually, Is It Worth the Hype? My Totally Unfiltered Take
So, is the Londoner actually *in* London, or...? (Duh.)
The Rooms: Did They Actually Deliver on the *Luxury* part?
Food, Glorious Food! Any Hidden Culinary Gems (or Disasters)?
The Entertainment: Did I Find My Inner James Bond, or Did I Just End Up Bored?
Service: Were the Staff Helpful, or Were They Just... Present?
Overall, Would I Go Back? (And Would *You* Enjoy it?)
Post a Comment for "Londoner Hotel Macau: Luxurious Escape Awaits!"